Overgeneralizing: When One Thing Seems Like Everything

Jul 24, 2022
4 min read

Updated: Jun 1

Have you ever had one bad moment and suddenly it felt like your whole day was ruined?

Or one disappointment and, before you know it, your brain is forecasting a lifetime of lonely Fridays or failed attempts?

That feeling—the one where your thoughts tumble into a foggy spiral of “always,” “never,” and “this will never get better”—has a name in the world of cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT). It’s called overgeneralizing, and it’s one of the most common cognitive distortions we walk through as humans. But more importantly, it’s one of the most hopeful to heal.

At Still Waters Counseling Center, we walk alongside people just like you—people who have felt swallowed by a single story or frozen by a false belief—and help them rediscover the bigger picture God is writing over their lives.

What Is Overgeneralizing?

In simple terms, overgeneralizing is when we take one moment, one mistake, or one hard situation and stretch it over everything else—past, present, and future.

Dr. David Burns, a leader in CBT, calls it “the cause of all depression” and describes it as being lost “in the clouds of abstraction.” The Latin roots of the word “abstract” mean “to spin away.” And isn’t that exactly what it feels like sometimes? Our thoughts start spinning out, drifting away from reality, away from hope, away from truth.

There are two main types of overgeneralizing:

1. Generalizing the Present into the Future

When something goes wrong, we assume it always will.

“No one wanted to date me—I'll be alone forever.”
“This project failed—nothing I do ever works out.”

Hopelessness loves to sneak in through this door. But the truth? Your right now does not determine your what's next.

2. Generalizing a Mistake into Your Identity

When one failure becomes a full-blown identity.

“I failed that test—I’m a failure.”
“I messed up—I’m always the one who ruins things.”

Sound familiar? This distortion tells us we are what we did, not what we’re learning or how we’re growing. But that’s not what God says.

The Hidden Story Behind the Thought

One of the most powerful tools in CBT is positive reframing—asking, “What does this distorted thought reveal about something good in me?”

If you’re generalizing after a failure, maybe it shows that you care about doing well.If you’re afraid of putting yourself out there again, maybe it reveals a longing for connection or excellence.

Even our distorted thoughts can point us toward our deepest desires. The goal isn’t to shame the thought—it’s to understand it and redirect it with truth.

Dr. Burns teaches clients to challenge these abstract clouds with specifics. For example:

“When exactly today did I become a failure?”
“What does the word failure even mean? And how many people would qualify by that definition?”

These kinds of questions pull us out of the fog and back into reality—where grace can meet us.

From Scripture: When the Clouds Close In

The prophet Jeremiah knew something about despair. In Lamentations, he pours out sorrow in poetic cries—laments that echo the pain of overgeneralizing. He and his people had been through devastation and could have easily believed it would never end.

But in chapter 3, something shifts. “Yet this I call to mind, and therefore I have hope…”

He trains his mind to remember something specific and true: God’s mercy never fails.Not some days. Not just when we’ve been perfect.Every. Single. Morning.

This is our lifeline when our thoughts want to spiral. We don't need to deny our pain—but we do need to call to mind what is still true. His mercies meet us in the fog, and His faithfulness will carry us through it.

A Story of Ordinary Faithfulness

Thomas Chisholm, the man behind the beloved hymn “Great Is Thy Faithfulness,” didn’t have a dramatic, headline-worthy story. He was an everyday man—teacher, pastor, insurance agent. He wrote poems in the quiet margins of his life. One of them eventually became the hymn that would circle the globe, offering hope to millions.

No fireworks. No fame. Just steady faithfulness.

What if Chisholm had believed the lie, “I’m just ordinary—God can’t use me”?

Friend, overgeneralizing convinces us that one moment disqualifies us from a meaningful life. But God’s economy is different. He specializes in using ordinary people to do extraordinary things, and He often writes His biggest miracles in the quietest ink.

Action Plan: Finding Clarity in the Fog

If you notice your thoughts spinning out—drawing huge conclusions from small moments—try these grounding steps:

Ask Questions:
- What am I really believing right now?
- Is this 100% true—or is it just how I feel?
- What evidence supports this thought? What evidence goes against it?
Positive Reframing:
- What does this thought reveal about something good in me?
- What benefit might I be trying to gain (e.g., safety, control)?
- Is there a healthier way to meet that need?
Let Scripture Speak Louder:
- Meditate on Lamentations 3:21–23.
- Create a “Mercies List” by writing down new signs of God’s faithfulness each day.
- Remember: if it’s morning, His mercy is already here.

A Final Word

Overgeneralizing fogs our minds, but God’s truth cuts through with light and clarity. The more we train our minds to focus on His Word, the less power our distorted thoughts will have.

You are not always going to feel this way.This is not forever.God’s mercy has already made a way forward.

And when you start to forget? Call it to mind. Just like Jeremiah did. Hope will follow.