Cognitive Distortions: When Our Thoughts Lie to Us

Sep 4, 2022
6 min read

Updated: Jun 1

I once believed every thought that crossed my mind.

If it whispered, You’re not good enough, I believed it.

If it muttered, Everyone else has it together but you, I nodded in agreement.

If it shouted, You’ve already failed, so what’s the point in trying?—well, I let that thought lead the way.

And maybe you’ve done that too. Maybe some part of your soul feels exhausted from following thoughts that steal your peace, sabotage your joy, and keep you stuck.

Friend, can I gently tell you something? Not every thought you think is true.

That’s not just biblical—it’s scientific. And today, we’re going to take a loving, grace-filled look at a term that might sound clinical but is actually deeply personal: cognitive distortions.

What Are Cognitive Distortions?

Let’s start simple. The word cognitive just means related to thinking. And distortion? It means something has been bent out of shape.

So, cognitive distortions are thoughts that have been twisted—out of line with reality. They aren’t lies we tell on purpose. They’re the kind of quiet beliefs that slide into our thinking without an invitation Like:

• If I’m not perfect, I’m a failure.

• Everyone’s upset with me.

• Things will never get better.

• If I’m not doing something productive, I’m worthless.

And sometimes—though it’s less talked about—cognitive distortions can also show up as unrealistically positive thoughts:

• I’m better than everyone else.

• I don’t need help—I’ve got this on my own.

Either way, distorted thinking pulls us away from grounded, grace-filled truth.

Why Do We Experience These Thought Patterns?

Let’s be clear: having distorted thoughts doesn’t make you weak, dramatic, or sick. It makes you human.

Our brains are wired to create shortcuts. We like patterns and predictability. So when something goes wrong, our mind tries to protect us by coming up with quick conclusions. But sometimes, those shortcuts aren’t accurate. They oversimplify, exaggerate, or catastrophize. And before we know it, they’ve shaped how we see the world.

If these thoughts happen occasionally, they might just cause a bad day. But when they become habitual, they can lead to anxiety, depression, shame, and broken relationships.

But here’s the hope: your thoughts can change. And when your thoughts change, your life follows.

The Biblical Invitation to Renew Your Mind

One of the most prolific truths told in Scripture is that transformation starts in the mind. Romans 12:2 says: “Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.”

That means the healing you’re praying for? The peace you’re desperate to feel? The clarity you crave? It begins not by fixing everything around you—but by renewing what’s inside you.

And how do we renew our minds? We align our thoughts with God’s Truth. Philippians 4:8 offers a beautiful filter: “Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.”

This doesn’t mean denying reality or pretending everything’s perfect. It means that when your thoughts are swirling with anxiety or despair, you gently ask: Is this thought true? Is it noble? Is it pure? Is it helpful?

If not, it may be time to challenge it.

Common Types of Cognitive Distortions

There are many different ways our thoughts can become distorted. Here are just a few examples:

• All-or-Nothing Thinking: Seeing things as black or white. (If I’m not the best, I’m a total failure.)

• Overgeneralization: Drawing broad conclusions from a single event. (Nothing ever works out for me.)

• Mind Reading: Assuming you know what others are thinking. (She didn’t say hi—she must be mad at me.)

• Catastrophizing: Expecting the worst. (If I mess this up, everything will fall apart.)

• Emotional Reasoning: Believing something is true because it feels true. (I feel worthless, so I must be.)

• Personalization: Blaming yourself for things outside your control. (It’s my fault she’s upset.)

Once you start to notice them, you’ll realize how often these thoughts show up—and how subtly they shape your emotions and decisions.

The Power of Awareness

You can’t change a thought you don’t notice.

Think of your mind like an iceberg. The thoughts you’re aware of are just the tip. But underneath the surface, there’s a whole world of patterns shaping how you feel and act.

So how do we get below the surface?

One key is emotional awareness. When you feel a spike of sadness, fear, shame, or anger, pause and ask:

“What was I just thinking?”

That simple question is like a flashlight in a dark room. It helps you spot the thought that sparked the emotion.

Then write it down. Don’t judge it. Just name it.

When you see it on paper, you can ask:

• Is this thought 100% true?

• What’s the evidence for and against it?

• Is there another way to view the situation?

• What does God’s Word say about this?

This is the beginning of healing. Not through force—but through gentle, grace-soaked awareness.

How CBT Helps—and Why It Aligns with Scripture

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) is one of the most researched and effective tools for working with cognitive distortions. It teaches us how to identify unhelpful thoughts, challenge them, and replace them with healthier, more realistic ones.

But here’s what I love: CBT and Scripture don’t compete—they complement each other.

CBT teaches us to question our automatic thoughts. Scripture teaches us to “take every thought captive” (2 Corinthians 10:5).

CBT asks us to examine the evidence. Scripture tells us to “test everything; hold fast what is good” (1 Thessalonians 5:21).

CBT invites us to reshape our beliefs. Scripture says, “Be transformed by the renewing of your mind” (Romans 12:2).

So when we use CBT in Christian counseling, we’re not replacing faith—we’re building on it. We’re using the minds God gave us, guided by the Word He breathed.

Your Action Plan: A Path to Peace

If you’re ready to take the next step, here’s a gentle, doable plan:

1. Notice Your Emotions

When you feel a strong emotional response, pause. Don’t run from it—get curious.

2. Identify the Thought

Ask, “What was I just thinking?” Write it down. Be honest. 3. Challenge the Thought

Is it absolutely true? What’s the evidence? How would I respond if a friend said this? 4. Replace with God’s Truth

Find a Scripture that speaks truth into the lie. Let God’s Word rewrite the script.

5. Practice and Repeat

This takes time. Be patient with yourself. Healing isn’t linear—but it’s always possible.

When You Need More Than a Blog Post

Let me be honest—sometimes, no matter how many verses you quote or thoughts you journal, the lies still feel loud. That’s when it may be time to invite a trusted counselor into your process.

A Christian counselor trained in CBT can help you:

• Name the distortions you can’t yet see • Challenge them with grace and truth

• Build new patterns rooted in Scripture

• Create a plan for peace that honors both your mind and your spirit

And you don’t have to do it alone.

A Final Word of Hope

Friend, if you’ve been battling thoughts that shame you, scare you, or exhaust you—know this: Your thoughts are not the boss of you.

You were created with a mind that can be renewed. You were given the Spirit of truth, not fear. You have access to wisdom and tools that can lead to transformation. And most importantly, you have a Savior who speaks a better word over your life.

So let’s not believe every thought that passes through our minds. Let’s measure them by God’s Word. Let’s challenge what’s distorted. And let’s anchor our hearts in what’s true.

Because the truth—God’s Truth—is what sets us free.

If you’d like help reshaping distorted thoughts through Christian counseling, our team is here for you. Let’s walk this journey together—toward clarity, peace, and the mind-renewing freedom only Christ can bring.